We understand, you missed the Olympics and baseball and some very sad football news, mostly because of Lollapalooza. Just because you don?t have time for sports, doesn?t mean you can?t listen to hours and hours of Red Hot Chili Peppers live, does it? It doesn?t. Still, don?t sweat it. VICE has the latest nuggets from this past week covered. If it?s not in here, it?s at a poetry slam.
Olympics:
- Michael Phelps?has retired from Olympic competition?as the?most decorated athlete?in the history of the games, beating?some old commie woman?who used to wrestle or something. Everyone likes to?shit on Phelps?for being a square, but what do they expect? He?s an Olympian! He lives at the pool. What, do you want him to curate an All Tomorrow?s Parties? Jesus, get over yourselves.
-The US Olympic basketball team?had a scare?by almost losing to Lithuania on Saturday. Luckily, LeBron James saved the day and they won. It?s a good thing America loves LeBron, right?
- A bunch of badminton teams?threw their round-robin games?so that they?d receive more favorable seeds when important action started. This?isn?t a big deal?basketball teams do it all the time?but it was a bad look, and fans were booing and so on and so forth. The IOC freaked the fuck out and bounced those teams from competition. Good riddance! Will this happen again when Brazil and Spain play in men?s hoops? Winner plays the US, and no one wants that.
- Some dude?opened a brothel?so he could pay for his Olympic training.
Source: http://vicemag.tumblr.com/post/28837553428
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